Now it’s been so long without Facebook

Now that over a year has elapsed since I deleted my Facebook, it’s time to evaluate whether my life has IMPROVED MONSTROUSLY.

The answer is: yes

I remember taking a trip to Italy in 2013, and spending a lot of time sharing my pics to Facebook, Twitter, and probably Instagram.  I remember walking past the internet spot at the hotel and seeing people on Facebook. I remember checking my phone a lot, wondering if so and so was viewing my TOTALLY AMAAAZING photos.

I remember using a meditation app on my phone to help me sleep. The irony of the situation is…if I never had a smart phone, I doubt i’d have needed the freaking meditation app to help unwind my brain. But that is a story for another time. See: Chapter on my nervous breakdown! coming May 20-never.

I remember the gnawing feeling that I didn’t use any of this social media stuff in a healthy way, and maybe I should just stop using it. The judgmental comments from others kept me on the apps. It has always been hard for me to not care what people think of me. The weird thing is, I have never felt that I fit in, so why did I even need the validation from others? It is certainly QUITE A PARADOX.

Well, eventually, I said, fuck it. I’m deleting this shitty account.

so, it’s been over a year, and I haven’t created a new Facebook. The temptation has been there, but it’s fleeting. I recently discovered that my high school class is going to have a 15 year reunion. I had no idea, because I don’t use Facebook, but I found out through someone else. So, I still found out. I wish  I hadn’t- The horror of realizing that 15 years, YEARS, has elapsed since high school ended has been quite the shock to my old bones.

Anyway, since it’s been a year without FB, and my addiction is gone, I’m in a good place to tell you what I think I’m missing out on, and what I think I am gaining, by not having a Facebook presence.

Cons: I do not get invited to high school reunions (or perhaps you would place this under the pro column?!)

I am no longer reminded of the birthday of my 5th grade gym teacher. Surely, she is quite distraught that she did not receive my ‘happy Bday’ Facebook text on her wall.

I am no longer tracked by russian bots, techbros, various stalkers (Or perhaps I have an inflated ego to think I might have an estalker or two?) or mark zuckerberg’s digital assistant, whose name is Janice, and she knows EVERYTHING about you!


PROS: I regained my ability to go a day without thinking,’ what witty thing can I write on my facebook today?!’ Oh, I am so funny! I need more likes! NO ONE liked my post yet. Delete it, delete it, quick!

I am now a millionaire living in an amazing house with my own farm, 100% organic cotton bedsheets, and an undying sense of self-worth that can NEVER be broken, EVER

Sooooooo. Yeah. Life is pretty much perfect now. Maybe you should delete your facebook, too!

note: Some things in this story may or may not have been slightly fabricated.



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